Have you ever struggled with having a “what if” question pop into your head (sometimes out of nowhere), and you find yourself engaging the initial question, which leads to another “what if” question, which leads to another, and another, until pretty soon you are envisioning worse case scenarios, and these scenarios repeat in your head like a broken record. If you answered yes, then you have experienced a worry spiral. Everyone worries from time to time; but if you find you are worrying more so than not, if this worry feels uncontrollable, and is interfering with your life, then you might be struggling with problematic worry. According to the Centre for Clinical Interventions website, worry is a type of “repetitive negative thinking” in which we get stuck or trapped in our thoughts about future negative things. A technique that I’ve learned and find helpful for worry management is called “Postponing Worry.” You might be wondering, why postpone, why not suppress worry instead. Worry suppression can actually lead to more worrisome thoughts. Have you ever told yourself “don’t think about that,” and you find “that” is exactly what you end up thinking about. This is why suppressing worry is often ineffective in helping control worrisome thoughts.

So what is worry postponement, and how do you do it?

I will provide a general overview about worry postponement here, but for more detailed information about this amazing technique, I invite you to visit the Centre for Clinical Interventions website (https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au). Postponing worry means choosing not to feed into the worry when that initial “what if” question pops in your head. It also means not pushing it away either (suppression).

Acknowledge the “what if” thoughts

When a worrying thought pops in your head, do not push it away, instead it means acknowledging the “what if” thought has popped into your head, and gently telling yourself that you will think about it later. Part of worry postponement is setting aside a consistent period of time daily (no more than one hour; and nowhere near bedtime!) in which to allow yourself time to worry. You can call this your “thinking time,” or “worry time.” So when you postpone, you are postponing to your “thinking time.” During your “thinking time,” you can worry as much as you want, but try to only worry about things that you feel are still relevant to worry about. Sometimes by the time you get to your “thinking time,” you may have forgotten what it was you were worried about. That’s okay, only worry about things that are still bothersome.

What to do when a worry pops into your head after “thinking time”

When a worry pops into your head outside of your “thinking time,” follow these steps. Acknowledge that a worry has popped into your head; tell yourself “I’ll think about that later,” then re-direct your focus to something occurring in the present (whether that is an activity you’re involved in, focusing on you immediate environment, or even centering your attention on your breathing). And each time another worry pops in (even if it’s the same worry), you repeat these steps: Acknowledge and postpone the worry, and re-direct your attention. Expect that worries will continue to pop into your mind, and know this does not mean postponement isn’t working (just more opportunity to practice postponement). It is important to remember that you can’t control what (or how often) worries pop into your head, but you can work toward changing how you respond. Responding with postponement allows you to contain your worrying to one part of that day, freeing up more time (that you were previously spending engaged in worrying) to be present and participate in things you enjoy. Worry postponement allows you to gain more control over your worry, instead of your worry controlling you.

When to Seek Counseling

It’s ok to have worries, and thoughts of “what if” pop into your head. We all have worries and fear. However, if you notice that you are constantly having these thoughts, or are struggling to move past them, it might be a good time to seek the help of a therapist. Our counselors here at Aspire Counseling work with college students and adults of all ages experiencing OCD, trauma, anxiety, worry, depression, stress, life transitions, and so much more. We urge you to reach out to our Client Care Coordinator, or fill out an online form.

About the Author

Katherine Ottofy is the newest addition to the Aspire Counseling team! Katherine has experience working with those with concerns of anxiety, depression, stress, grief, self-esteem, and much more. Katherine truly believes in gratitude, and practicing a positive outlook on life, along with appreciating the little things in life! When she is not working with her clients at Aspire Counseling, Katherine loves hanging out with her two dogs!