“My Parents Are Making Me Go to Therapy”: What to Actually Expect (and Why It Might Actually Be Useful)
Your parents have suggested that you need therapy. But what's the point? How will talking to some random adult help anything?
You can see it now. This adult is just going to listen to you complain about your parents, friends, and school. So what? They've been out of high school so long, there's no way they'll understand. And even if they did, how's that going to help?
Or maybe you went to a therapist before. They basically told you to change how you think and you'll feel better. Like that's so easy. If you could think your way to feeling better, you would have done that already.
So, what's the point?
In this post, we're going to talk about Aspire Counseling's approach to teen therapy, what privacy actually looks like, and give you some very specific questions you can ask a therapist when you first meet to see if it's a good fit.
Can my parents force me to go to therapy?
The short answer is yes, your parents probably can "make" you go to therapy. At least to some extent. You can kick and scream and refuse to get in the car, but they can offer some pretty harsh consequences if you do.
But here's the thing: your parents can't decide how much you "get" out of going to counseling.
They can drive you to our Lee's Summit office near 50 Highway or set up an online appointment. They can sit in the waiting room. But once you're in the room with your therapist? That's between you and them.
You get to decide:
How much you share
Whether you actually try the stuff your therapist suggests
If you're willing to give it a real shot
So while your parents might be able to get you through the door, you're actually the one with the power here.
What if I hate my therapist? Or they just don't understand me?
Valid concern. Not every therapist is a good fit for every person.
At Aspire Counseling, we work really hard to match you with someone who's going to get you. We have therapists with different styles, different backgrounds, and different specialties. Some of our therapists work specifically with teens dealing with anxiety, trauma, OCD, or depression.
But if you meet with your therapist and it feels off? You're allowed to say something.
You can literally tell your therapist, "This isn't feeling like a good fit for me." A good therapist won't be offended. They'll either work with you to figure out what would make it better, or help you connect with someone else on our team who might be a better match.
You're not stuck. You're not being rude. You're being honest about what you need.
If you want to see who our therapists are before you even start, you can check out our therapist bios to get a sense of who might be a good fit for you.
Will my therapist tell my parents everything I say?
No. And this is really important.
Most of what you talk about in therapy is private. Your therapist isn't going to run out and tell your parents every detail of your session.
Here's how it works:
Your therapist might share general updates with your parents, like:
"We're working on coping skills for anxiety."
"We talked about communication strategies today."
But they're not sharing specifics like:
What you said about your friend group drama
The specific thoughts you're having about yourself
Details about your relationship or who you're into
The exceptions (and your therapist will explain these to you):
If you're planning to seriously hurt yourself
If you're planning to hurt someone else
If someone is abusing you
In those situations, your therapist might need to involve a parent or another adult to keep you safe. But they should tell you what they're doing and why.
Bottom line: You are the client. Not your parents. The therapy is for you, and your therapist's job is to create a space where you feel safe enough to actually talk about what's going on.
What makes therapy at Aspire Counseling different?
Okay, so maybe you're thinking, "Sure, but therapy is therapy. What's different about Aspire?"
Fair question. Here's what we do differently:
We use treatments that actually work
We're not just nodding along while you talk. We use something called evidence-based treatments—basically, therapy approaches that have real research showing they help.
If you're dealing with:
Anxiety – We use approaches like CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), exposure therapy, and ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). If you’re struggling with anxiety, look both at our anxiety treatment page and our anxiety counseling for children & teens page to get a full picture of what your therapy experience might include.
Depression – We use CBT, DBT skills (Dialectical Behavior Therapy), and other approaches that help you feel less stuck
Trauma – We use EMDR, TF-CBT (Trauma-Focused CBT), and other trauma-specific therapies
OCD – We use ERP (Exposure and Response Prevention), which is the gold standard for OCD treatment
You can read more about how we approach teen therapy on our Teen Counseling page.
We actually track whether it's helping
We don't just assume therapy is working. We use something called measurement-based care, which basically means we check in regularly to see if you're actually feeling better.
You might fill out quick questionnaires every few weeks about your anxiety, depression, or other symptoms. It's not a test. It's just a way to make sure we're heading in the right direction.
If things aren't improving, we adjust. We don't just keep doing the same thing and hoping it magically works.
The relationship with your therapist actually matters
There's research showing that how comfortable you feel with your therapist is one of the biggest factors in whether therapy helps.
So if you don't feel heard, understood, or respected? That's a problem. And it's something we care about fixing.
We want you to feel like your therapist is on your team. Not like they're just another adult telling you what to do.
Will I have therapy homework?
Maybe. And we know that's annoying.
But here's why: Therapy isn't just about talking. It's about learning new skills and trying them out in your real life.
Your therapist might ask you to:
Fill out short check-in forms between sessions
Try a coping skill when you're feeling anxious or upset
Notice patterns in your thoughts or behaviors
Practice something you talked about in session
It's not homework like school homework. It's more like experiments—trying things to see what actually helps you feel better.
And honestly? The teens who try the stuff between sessions are usually the ones who see the biggest changes.
What should I ask in my first session?
If you're going to your first therapy appointment (whether it's in person at our Lee's Summit office off 470 or online from your house), here are some questions you can ask:
About privacy:
"What will you tell my parents after our sessions?"
"In what situations would you need to break confidentiality?"
About the therapy approach:
"What kind of therapy do you use with teens? What will a typical session look or feel like?”
"How will we know if it's working?"
About the relationship:
"What happens if I don't feel like this is a good fit?"
"Can I tell you if something you say doesn't feel helpful?"
A good therapist will welcome these questions. They're not going to be annoyed or defensive.
What if I'm still not sure?
That's fair. You don't have to go from "This is pointless" to "I'm all in" right away.
Here's what you can do:
Look at the first 8 sessions as an experiment.
Give it a real shot. Show up. Be honest. Try one or two of the things your therapist suggests.
We recommend trying 8 sessions before you make any “conclusions” because there’s research that show those first 8 sessions are critical. It takes that long for you and your therapist to really determine how well you work together and to form a strong therapeutic relationship. Furthermore, in 8 sessions you should be starting to notice some shifts or have learned some new skills that are helpful or at a minimum have a clear picture of how therapy is going to look.
After those first 8 counseling sessions, check in with yourself:
Do I feel at least a little bit understood?
Am I learning anything useful?
Do I feel like my therapist is actually listening to me?
If the answer is yes to even one of those, keep going. If the answer is no to all of them, it's worth talking to your therapist about it or trying someone else.
You don't have to stay stuck
Here's the truth: You might be dealing with anxiety, depression, OCD, trauma, or something else that's making life harder than it needs to be.
And yeah, it sucks that your parents are the ones pushing you toward therapy. But if there's even a small chance that a few months of talking to someone could help you feel less anxious, less sad, less stuck—wouldn't that be worth trying?
You deserve to feel better. Not because we're supposed to say that, but because it's true.
And therapy at Aspire Counseling—whether you're coming to our office in Lee's Summit, our Columbia location, or meeting with us online—is designed to actually help you get there.
Ready to give teen counseling a chance?
If you want to learn more about what teen therapy at Aspire Counseling looks like, check out our Teen Counseling page.
You can also browse our therapist bios to see who might be a good fit for you.
And if you (or your parents) want to schedule a free consultation to ask questions before committing, you can reach out through our contact page.
We're here when you're ready. And we promise—this doesn't have to be like therapy you've tried before.
About the Author
Jessica Oliver is the founder of Aspire Counseling and for years specialized in working with teenagers. She’s passionate about making sure that therapy is actually worth a person’s time. That it helps you actually make the changes you want to see in your life. She believes a therapist isn’t only a person to chat with or vent to, but rather a person who helps provide options for your and supports you as you become the person you want to be. Teenagers have been at Aspire Counseling since the day we opened, and Jessica is proud that our practice takes an approach of empowering teenagers and trusting that even if there is a lot they’re still figuring out in life, they truly do hold the key to their own future. She loves talking to parents, but ultimately sees Teen Counseling as the teenager’s journey that parents, teachers & therapists simply are there acting as support.
