Working with Parts in IFS Therapy
Maybe you’ve heard about IFS, or you heard about parts work and you’re wondering what that is and how it works. It’s my goal today to give you an understanding and a peek into how that works and what to expect. If you want a broader view of IFS, you can read about that in a previous blog post.
How Do You Begin Parts Work in IFS?
Working with our parts is first an emotional and felt experience. We begin by just paying attention to our minds and bodies and identifying what we are feeling and thinking. This first step is just grounding us to the present moment. You may have specific topics you wanted to address today, which is fine, but we always check in to see where we are before moving forward. As we name the present thoughts and emotions, we gently check in to see what needs our attention today.
Why Do We Name and Separate Emotions in IFS?
In IFS we believe that multiple emotions and experiences can happen simultaneously, so as we notice all that we are feeling and thinking, we name them and begin to separate them out to gain clarity of everything that is going on inside. It’s from this place of greater clarity that we want to choose what to focus and work on in this session. We’re often drawn to the higher energy emotions as those represent some of our biggest concerns.
What Is a 'Part' in IFS Therapy?
Once we have an emotion or thought identified, this is when the real work begins. This is what we call a part. There’s frequently confusion that happens around this step and it’s useful to name it at the beginning. We’re using emotions to identify a part, but that does not mean that part is that emotion. All parts can experience all emotions, but the current emotion signals the part that needs attention. In session, if you identify an angry part, you’ll hear the therapist talk about focusing on that angry part. This is only because the anger is how the part is making itself known. With further questioning and exploration, we’ll get to know who this part is even more.
What Does It Mean to 'Unblend' from a Part in IFS?
We’ve identified the part, and now we try to do something we call unblending or separating from that part. The point of this is that we want you to have the ability to know the emotion is there without getting overwhelmed or controlled by that emotion. In IFS, and with parts work, we use the concept of parts to help the emotion have an interactive aspect. We’ll ask you to maybe visualize the part who is angry, so you might visualize a person who looks angry. Visualization is used a lot, but it doesn’t work for everyone. How you experience parts is unique to you and anything goes. As we create this distinction between the part that is angry and you who is not angry, we simultaneously allow you to experience this emotion while also remaining calm and curious towards that emotion.
Why Is Unblending So Powerful in IFS Therapy?
This is where the magic of IFS happens. Your emotions and beliefs are present and accessible, but they are also not in control. Separation allows you to stay calm and curious and you can spend time uncovering what is driving your reactions and intense emotional energy. It’s also an opportunity to learn you have access to calm and stability at any point in time. When you can let your strong emotions stay in the parts that have them, you can remain calm in any situation. You can be the support your parts need and when they feel supported, they won’t take over your actions and you can fully live into your values.
Begin IFS Therapy in Lee’s Summit
If you’re interested in giving this a try and learning more about yourself and your parts, feel free to contact Aspire Counseling to get started. You don’t have to figure it all out before reaching out. That first step can be as simple as scheduling a consultation. We’ll take it from there—together.
About the Author
Adam White is a licensed counselor with over five years of experience supporting clients in the Kansas City, Missouri area. He specializes in treating anxiety, depression, and trauma, and uses evidence-based approaches like Internal Family Systems (IFS) to help clients reconnect with their inner calm, develop greater self-understanding, and heal from within.
At Aspire Counseling, he is committed to providing compassionate, expert care—both in-person at our Lee’s Summit office and through secure online therapy for clients across Missouri.
