You're halfway through telling your therapist about something hard. Maybe it's the fight you had with your sister. Then, somehow, you're talking about work. Or your dog. Or a funny thing that happened at the grocery store.
And your therapist stops you.
If that's happened to you, it may have caught you off guard. Most of us were raised to believe interrupting is rude. So why would a therapist do it?
Usually, it's on purpose. I talked about this with Jordan Lascuola, LCSW, one of our therapists in Columbia, on October 9, 2026. Jordan specializes in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). Interrupting happens to be one of his favorite tools, and he was pretty honest about why.
Why do we switch stories right in the middle of a hard one?
First, you're not doing therapy wrong. Jordan was quick to say he does this too.
"I know I have told many stories, and in the middle of those stories I have switched gears and talked about a different story," he said. "And I find that that happens really frequently in therapy."
It makes sense. When a story starts to stir up something painful, your brain looks for the exit. Changing the subject is one of the easiest exits there is. It's quick, it's polite, and most of the time you don't even notice you did it.
Jordan sees this as part of being human. Our brains are built to steer us away from discomfort, and that has helped us survive for a very long time. He described emotions as stories our bodies are trying to tell us.
"Sometimes, especially the stories that we don't want, we just decide we're good. I'm not gonna read that story. I'm gonna put that book down."
Switching to a different story is one way of putting the book down. The trouble is, the book is still there. Hard feelings don't go away just because we stop talking about them. We wrote more about that in The Beach Ball: Why Not Just Avoid Emotions?
What is your therapist really asking when they stop you?
Jordan called this one of his favorite things to do in session. When he notices a client drifting, he'll jump in mid-sentence.
"Excuse me, wait a second. What is showing up for you right now? As you're telling me the story, what's happening for you? What are you noticing emotionally?"
Or, if the story has changed:
"Why are you telling me two different stories right now? I want to go back to the first one. Tell me more about that."
That's not a gotcha. It's an invitation to slow down. Jordan described what happens next as a shared pause, where both of you stop and ask, "What is that, actually?"
"It sort of brings light to what it is that we like to avoid so easily."
The answer might be a tight chest. It might be sadness you didn't expect. It might be anger, or guilt, or even nothing at all. There's no wrong answer. The point is to notice what's there instead of rushing past it.
I do this in my own sessions, too. Sometimes I'll think, if I don't stop us here, we're going to keep going down this other path, and this piece matters. Often, the first story is the one worth staying with.
Isn't mindfulness supposed to be meditation?
When people hear "mindfulness," they often picture sitting quietly with their eyes closed. That's one way to practice. Jordan was clear that he's a fan.
But he sees the interruption as mindfulness, too. It's a way "to practically practice some of the mindful components that come with acceptance and commitment therapy, rather than sitting down and having a contemplative practice, which is also, for the record, fabulous."
In ACT, mindfulness isn't about getting calm. It's about noticing what's here right now, including the uncomfortable stuff. You can read more about that in What Mindfulness Really Means in ACT Therapy.
Practicing it in session has a real advantage. You're not noticing your breath in a quiet room. You're noticing what comes up while you talk about something that actually matters to you, with someone right there to help you stay with it.
That skill carries over. The goal isn't to feel every feeling all the time. It's to stop organizing your life around avoiding them. As Jordan put it, the question becomes, "How do we hold that with us while also moving toward the things that we care about?"
Jordan wrote about how that turns into real action in How to Take Action When You Don't Feel Ready. That's a big part of what acceptance and commitment therapy is about. Less running from what you feel. More room to live the life you want.
What if being interrupted feels rude or awkward?
That's a fair reaction. Being stopped mid-sentence can sting, especially if you grew up being talked over or not taken seriously.
If it bothers you, say so. A good therapist wants to know. You can say something like, "When you stop me, I lose my train of thought," or "That felt a little abrupt." That conversation is part of therapy too, and it usually makes the work better.
It also helps to know a few things:
Not every new story is avoidance. Sometimes the second story is connected, and your therapist will want to hear it. Jordan's question is curious, not a test.
You don't have to have an answer. "I don't know what I'm feeling" is a completely okay place to start.
The goal isn't to make you cry. It's to give the hard part a little more room than it usually gets.
A lot of therapy feels a bit strange at first. We wrote about that in Why Does Therapy Sometimes Feel Awkward at First? If you worry your feelings will be too much once you stop rushing past them, What If My Emotions Are Too Much for a Therapist? may help. And if you're a few sessions in and unsure whether it's working, read How Long Should I Keep Going If Therapy Doesn't Feel Helpful the First Few Sessions?
The relationship with your therapist matters a lot here. Being interrupted feels very different when you trust the person doing it. That's one reason feeling comfortable with your therapist is so important.
So the next time your therapist stops you mid-story, try getting curious with them. What was showing up right before you changed the subject? That moment might be the most useful part of the session.
Begin ACT Therapy in Columbia or Online Across Missouri
At Aspire Counseling, we believe in doing what works. Several of our therapists use acceptance and commitment therapy, and they don't just learn it once and move on. They keep refining it together through ongoing consultation.
Jordan Lascuola, LCSW has more than 100 hours of ACT training and is also trained in DBT. He sees clients ages 14 and up in our Columbia office and through online therapy anywhere in Missouri. He especially enjoys working with deep thinkers, people who've spent years avoiding hard feelings, and neurodivergent clients who are tired of masking.
We start with a free consultation, so you can get a feel for whether it's a good fit. If it isn't, we'll help you find someone on our team who is.
To get started:
Call our Columbia office at 573-328-2288
Call our Lee's Summit office at (816) 287-1116
Reach out online, or ask our client care team to call you at a time that works for you
Whenever you're ready to stop running from what you feel, we're here.
About the Author
Jessica Oliver, MSW, LCSW (formerly Jessica Tappana), is the founder and clinical director of Aspire Counseling. She has worked in mental health since 2008 and completed ACT Level 2 training in 2017. ACT's focus on values and willingness shapes how she approaches anxiety and trauma work, and she uses the same kind of in-the-moment noticing described here in her own sessions.
This post is based on Jessica's interview with Jordan Lascuola, LCSW, on October 9, 2026. Jordan is an ACT specialist with more than 100 hours of training and a background in higher-acuity outpatient care. He's also part of Aspire's DBT consultation team. Jessica built Aspire around therapists like Jordan, who know their approach deeply and keep sharpening it together.
